I always have a plan. I’m always prepared. Whether it’s studying for an exam or picking out an outfit to wear the following day, I always take good care to make sure I’m ready. I have a vision in my mind of how things are likely to go. I take that vision and plan accordingly.

Now, I’m not sure how many other people do that. Maybe I’m one of a small population of people high-strung on making sure I don’t embarrass myself somehow or end up unprepared. It goes hand-in-hand with not wanting to be in the spotlight for any reason. It’s that underlying fear of being singled out in a negative way, even if it’s something small and inconsequential.

However, there is something that I’ve been thinking about. Spontaneity.

Thinking back, whenever I’ve done something out-of-character (a.k.a brave), it’s always been on the spur of the moment.

In other words, it was never planned.

I’ve mentioned this briefly in my last post, but one of the times that I did something randomly and bravely, it was during QC’s Fall Fest 2010. There was a mechanical bull, and I remember feeling this uncharacteristic urge to just go ahead and do it. I guess you can say I had an adrenaline rush of sorts. My heart was pounding and my palms were sweating, but I just really, really wanted to try something new, right then and there. I didn’t just ride it once, but I rode it twice.

It was the most spontaneous thing I’d ever done.

Thinking back on that memory, I feel a mixture of embarrassment and pride. I barely lasted two seconds on that bull (both times), so there’s always a sense of, “What the hell was I thinking?” However, there is still some underlying pride that I actually did it. Besides, no one remembers the way I slid off that bull pathetically, so why should I feel embarrassed?

It was fun, and it was fun because it wasn’t planned.

So, my plan this year is to be a little more spontaneous. Yes, I realize that statement is something of a contradiciton in itself, but it sort of isn’t.

I’m not going to plan how to be spontaneous. I’m not sure that’s even possible, considering the very definition of spontaneity. I’m just going to go about my days and wait for the right opportunity. Remembering the confidence I felt in those mere seconds before I got on that bull, I want to feel that again. I want to feel that every day, without the need to do something out of nowhere.

So, I’m throwing spontaneity on my growing list of ways to step out my comfort zone with whatever this campus has to offer. I’m wondering if the bull will be back at this year’s Fall Fest.

Also, on a slightly irrelevant note, Club Day is coming up! I think it’s next week, but I’m not sure. I’m very, very excited. Joining a club is a must for me this year. What better way to meet new people? I think that would be a great place to start.

This is just the beginning of a long, interesting journey.