So I had a conversation with my brain earlier today…
Me: Alright Brain, I need you to get your act together and start studying for my upcoming midterms!
Brain: Aw shush, can’t you see I’m mentally preparing myself for Winter Break?
Me: ASDFJKL; THERE WON’T BE A WINTER BREAK IF YOU DON’T PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER AND START STUDYING!
Brain: Oh my dear, you underestimate me and my ability to shut down for long periods of time. If I say it’s Winter Break, then you can bet it’s Winter Break.
Me: You’re evil. EVIL.
Brain: You shouldn’t have watched so many bad-guy movies then. Don’t you know I soak things up like a sponge?
Me: GAAAHHH. *stomps away in frustration; Brain smirks and leans back in its oversized plush armchair*

Yeah…that Brain can be a downright evil little thing. You know if I didn’t find myself so attached to it, I would’ve chucked the useless thing right out the window by now. Point is, it seems like my willpower and I are on our own this time. Again. Ahh, the sweet, sweet scent of Procrastination.

A quick comprehensive guide for all the Procrastinating-Newbies out there. Oh you innocent, unsuspecting souls. *pats your head* There there.

So what’s a girl to do when her pride, promises, and practically every ounce of sanity depends on buckling down and showing those textbooks (and that Brain) who’s boss? She buckles down and whips out the Boss card, gosh darn it! She locks herself in her room with a mug of hot chocolate topped with whipped cream and a plate of fruit and she reads every word on every lecture slide and analyzes every picture-oh, what’s that? One of my favorite artists just released his new album after 3 years? Say what?!-NO. You are strong. You can resist the pull of his heavenly music. RESIST.

She is focused. She forces herself to see only the PowerPoints in front of her. She highlights a key term when necessary, scribbles a note in the margins to help her remember, and uses all her determination to ignore that beautiful little computer icon with its siren-like call of the Internet. Just one click…one click and I’ll open a world of possibilities! DARN IT. NO. She stomps outside, ignoring all the eyes turned towards her in surprise, and unplugs the router. MUAHAHAHA TAKE THAT SIREN CALL.

Ok fine, maybe I didn’t go so far as to take my frustration out on the poor router, but the point here is the same. Procrastination is a thorn in everyone’s side, and while there might be books out offering “5 easy tips to beat that Procrastination Bug!” honestly it all comes down to one factor: you. And, well, your brain, but essentially you. Procrastination is truly a mental thorn, and I don’t care how many tips that book is offering you, it all comes down to can you buckle down and pull yourself together and do what needs to be done? I know it’s not an easy task, but at the end of the day, it’s all about how much you care, or really, how much care you can muster up, and using that to motivate yourself and focus on your task. Of course, it helps to get rid of distractions as much as you can, but it’s about you and your willpower to really force yourself to do what needs to be done, to settle for long-time gratification rather than instant. It may not sound like fun but I guarantee you, it’s always worth it in the end.

Obviously, if you were expecting a post with step-by-step tips to beat procrastination, you were mistaken. Sorry about that. Might I recommend you check out that book instead? However, from one procrastinator to another, I do get it, and what I’m willing to offer you, besides a sympathetic nod, is a big mental slap. *SLAP* In the words of Edna from The Incredibles:

Alright, I’m going to leave you with one last tidbit of wisdom in the form of a giant warning sign.

Seriously. They’re like ninjas. YOU’VE BEEN WARNED.