Anxiety

So Spring Break is over and I’m still tired.  I guess one could argue that I am too young to be tired but everybody deserves to say that they are tired at one point or another.  This year I am finally graduating.  It has been a long and arduous journey working and going to school all of these years, so this year is so very rewarding for me.  In addition, I am beginning the process of applying to Law school. I’m scheduled for my LSAT, I have my recommendations on the way and all that is left is to send everything out.  Oh, I mustn’t forget the hefty application fees I have to send out along with every application that I am going to have to open a separate savings account for.  I am applying for entry into a Law program for the Fall of 2012. Why 2012? Well, just take a look at the yearly tuition and you’ll see why I need that time to save money.  I was pondering about what the 8 months will be like when I won’t be in school, when I don’t have to rush to class after work and on weekends, when I won’t have to do homework on my one day off in the week, when I feel bored for the first time since god knows when, when I’m able to actually eat three meals in one day which I don’t think I’ve done since 2008, when I actually regain my social life and when I am no longer an undergrad.  It’s almost frightening to imagine what my life will be like without the hustle that I know it to be now, where I have to schedule hanging out with a friend two months in advance and around any tests, appointments, classes or other non-social events.  Not being in school, even for this one week, is unfulfilling. I cannot imagine what it will be like to live life without learning or reading something new often, even if it is temporarily.  Perhaps I have an addiction to school because it is always welcoming, always pleasant, will never let you down, and will always reward you for your effort.  It is an investment in one’s time rather than a waste such as many of the frivolous activities that the youth of the world generally flocks to much like the activities that keep the tradition of “Spring Break” alive.  I wonder…